"It is not our abilities that determine who we are, it is our choices." ~Albus Dumbledor

May 6, 2013

I'm A Bus Rider

You get out of school, jump up and down for joy, and then hop on the bus. It's a routine we've done since elementary school! Buses aren't foreign to us. The big yellow "twinkles" that everyone sees driving down the street between 2:15 and 2:45 PM. The annoying yellow vehicles that all of the soccer moms driving somewhere in a hurry hate because of the infernal traveling stop signs attached to the monster-like transportation aids. Like, why do I have to stop? Children? Bad excuse.

For some reason, everybody loves to sit in the back of the bus. Don't ask me why, or how the trend started, but I made a list of people that like to sit back there. Allow me to share with you folk:

-Kids who have spiky hair
-People with runny noses
-Alien lovers
-24/7 gamers
-Poodle-walkers
-Contractors for fathers
-The kids who always have wifi
-Talkers
-Short people
-Left arm baseball catchers
-"One-man's-trash-is-another-man's-trash-as-well" people
-The half-earbud wearers
-People who don't capitalize first letters. Or their "I's."
-People with super sniffers
-Pringle eaters
-Grandpa lovers
-Cockroach vanquishers
-Kids who still believe in cooties, but are dying to be infected
-Vuluvalzvlavlazva blowers (you know, those things they play at the soccer World Cup)
-Sand castle kickers
-People with photogenic pinkies
-Sneaky night game players
-Prefer Gatorade over Powerade
-And more, if you ask them yourself

So if you want to sit in the back of the bus, you gotta fit that criteria. Otherwise they will eat you alive, chew you up, and stick you under the seat like used gum. (Which is probably untrue, but I wouldn't risk it) Also carry your wits about you when riding buses. You never know when you may need to be witty. Just saying.

But I for one do not sit in the back of the bus. You gotta stay alive in this world, after all. Therefore, I'm more of a mid-to-front area sitter. Because generally, that's where the least amount of people are, and if you don't have to talk to anybody and make yourself look like a fool, why talk?? Nope. I prefer to sit and look out the window, watching the houses and shrubs go by as my knees dig into the seat in front of me.

Farewell for now, kind blog readers. May your bus rides be ever more enlightened, and if too many people start coming on the bus, just know that I for one will be leaving to drive myself.

But as for now, I am a bus rider.

April 29, 2013

Bittersweet

Bittersweet is that sour taste in your mouth
When your emotions run dry
And your words have run out

Knowing what's done is done
That there's nothing to do
It's time to move on

Bittersweet is that aching you feel
When dream becomes reality
But the truth isn't real

Seeing those signs that destroy
Goodbye, one I loved
Tearing each girl and boy

Bittersweet, the nostalgic memories
That live in the back of your mind
Being tossed by the seas

Realizing you're finally alone
Unsure of where to go
Because you lost what was best known

But bittersweet isn't all bitter
For the sweet is still there
Hidden in the discouraging litter

Bringing sunshine to life
And warming the heart
Knowing you did something right

The sweet is the trembling happiness felt
When you strengthen your mind
And your heart never melts

Yes, saying goodbye now
Will lead to things greater
And brighter around

Bittersweet is corse
But it's also freeing
For better or worse

You just have to let go
So you can start seeing
And finally believing

It's for the better.

~Trevor Howell

April 26, 2013

Words That Aught To Be Words - Volume 2

Words That Aught To Be Words
Volume 2

  1. Armapathy - v. Bringing your arm down after holding it up for 30+ seconds because the teacher failed to notice you somehow, and because the blood flow had stopped reaching your fingers.
  2. Chirl - n. A chair that is highly uncomfortable and distracting to sit on because the fourth leg doesn't reach the floor.
  3. Clutzor - n. A nickname for a person who constantly trips over their own feet.
  4. Illuminoff - n. The burt-out lightbulb that nobody ever replaces because it's in the highest, most awkwardly positioned location.
  5. Lawnominus - v. The act of ripping out handfuls of grass and placing it on the leg of the person sitting next to you.
  6. Returnigination - v. The act of sifting through the fridge, closing it, and coming back after looking through the pantry in hopes that something new has materialized.
  7. Telaudible - v. The act of yelling at sports referees through the television.
  8. Teledetermination - v. The act of pressing the buttons on the remote significantly harder the second time, because they didn't work the first time.
  9. Toitzheimers - n. The condition of flushing the toilet twice because you forgot you had flushed it the first time.
  10. Wordeyed - adv. Describing the act of staring at a word for so long you begin to wonder if you spelled it correctly, and if you had always spelled it that way.

April 25, 2013

Some Things

I need to write on my blog again. Like, make an actual post! The problem is, I don't have one specific thing I want to write about. So if my thoughts are everywhere, forgive me. Because I'm most likely just going to write what comes to my mind. So here goes...


Remember when we were children? When we ran around on those summer days with no cares in the world. Getting tired one moment, lying in the grass, feeling the soft breeze on our perfect faces. We would sit up, look around, and giggle as we took off once more, thinking that we had tricked our parents yet again. But they knew. They knew because they had been in our spot before. They knew because we were their children. They knew because we were children.

Aren't we still children? Do we really know what cares there actually are in the world? We pretend we do. We pretend like our math load is too much to handle. We pretend that we are too busy with some things to do other things. But the reality is, we aren't. I've lost count of how many times I've psyched myself out with my homework load, thinking that I will have no time for anything else. The outcome is always the same, though. I have free time.

But when you look at adults, do they get the free time we do? I don't know about you, but it seems like my dad never has any free time. And that's when I have to reflect back on my own life. Reflect back on what really matters at this point in my life. Is it school? Is it my social life? (Psych! Hahahaha. What social life.) Is it the extracurricular activities we are involved in? Is it close friends? What is it? Because some things come, and some things go, but only a few things stay. And I think that's what we should focus on.

So what things stay? It's hard to say, seeing as we can't look into our future. Will our best friends stay with us? Will the relationships we have formed at this time in our lives stay? Will the knowledge we "gained" in all of our science classes stay? (Hahahaha, no.) What matters? And what if what we think matters, really doesn't matter? And if what we think doesn't matter, does? What then? Well my friends, that is the point people start to have mental, and sometimes physical, breakdowns.

One thing I am sure of, however, is God's love. And that is one thing that is certain to stay. One of the most profound lyrics in modern music, in my opinion, comes from the song, "Don't You Worry Child." When I first heard it, I was like, "What? There is hope for the world??" The line was this:

Don't you worry child, don't you worry child, see heaven's got a plan for you.

And aren't we still children? Don't we still run around on summer days with no cares in the world? Do we really need to worry about what life will bring? Because as much as we do worry, and as hard as it is to stop, we really have no need to. Because heaven has a plan for us. All we need to do is trust.


Well, I was right! That went everywhere. I also made a new discovery about myself after proof-reading: all of my blog posts seem to end with faith in God, in some way. I don't mean to preach, I just post what I believe. I also think it's kind of significant as well. Don't all of our lives eventually tie back to God in the end? Just a thought.

Hmmmm. Mmkay. I'm done now. Bye guys.

April 1, 2013

Torn

I can't describe
How you make
Me feel

It's lodged deep inside
Making it feel
Unreal

I can't say
Who you are
Or what I am
To you

Will you stay
Brilliant star
Burn on to
Light my way

Since I met you I can't breathe
And now I would die if you leave

You make it
Easy to
Think we all
Glow

Would it
Surprise you if
All of us humans on the
Ground below
Don't even know
Of angels who come from the sun?

You may be the only one.

Do you realize
Now that I've
Seen you

I cannot
Settle for
Number two

I can't say
Who you are
Or who I am
To you

Will you be
My bright star
Burn on to
Lead me to you

Since I met you I can't breathe
Did you know I would die if you leave

You make it
Easy to
Think we all
Glow

Would it
Surprise you if
All of us humans on the
Ground below
Don't even know
Of angels who come from the sun?

You may be the only one.

Would it
Surprise you if
All of us humans on the
Ground below
Don't even know
Of angels who come from the sun?

You may be the only one.

~Trevor Howell

March 2, 2013

Roller Coaster

As many of you have heard, my family was literally a signature away from leaving our lovely Lehi home to move to Chicago, the other windy city. I suppose that now it's all over, I can give a quick synopsis of the details and behind the scenes.

So a few months ago, my father found this company in Chicago while looking for new jobs, like he had been doing for a while. At the same time he was also interviewing with Microsoft in Seattle, which he had high hopes for, but ultimately didn't go anywhere. I knew that he was interviewing with both companies, and I informed him that, if it came to it, I would rather live in Seattle than Chicago. He laughed and reassured me that it was still a ways down the road and I didn't need to worry about it now.

Well the last two weeks have been the most difficult my parents have had to face, because we had reached that way down the road with the Chicago company.

Two weeks ago Monday, my dad was flown out to Chicago by the company he had been interviewing with so that they could get the feel of him in person. Two days later, they extended an offer. At first glance, my dad was ecstatic! He had been searching for a new job for quite some time now, and had finally gotten a great offer from a company he had high hopes for! And to top it off, it was in Chicago!

...Oh wait. Chicago. That's out of state.

Since my dad had come out of college, he had always expected to move out of state and raise a family outside of Utah. Whether because he had grown up in Utah himself, or was just an adventurous guy, I don't know. But coming out of college, he landed an internship in the very city he was now being faced with returning to. So it's not like it would be completely foreign to them. But moving! The costs were just too high to even consider it. So he regretfully informed the company of his dilemma, and prepared to keep searching for new opportunities.

Then the company came back offering an extremely generous relocation package. Oh boy. What to do now? Que the soul searching. Over the period of about the next five days, my parents went back and forth with the decision of moving - some days yes, some days no - but weren't always on the same page. He had to give them their answer by Monday at noon, and tried hard to find an answer by then, but he couldn't get it.

Then Monday came. He went into work that day preparing to inform the company yet again that he would have to decline, but right before noon came, he and my mom had a talk on the phone, during which my mom said, "Go for it." And so with that, his opinion changed and he accepted their offer. Look out Chicago, here we come.

But wait, it doesn't end there. After accepting the offer, my mom was still very apprehensive. She didn't know why, but she just had a terrible feeling about the whole move, and couldn't shake it. So Tuesday became the final emotional drain pipe, and Wednesday morning my dad once more called them back. He informed them of all the goings on, and the tough situation we had been in. He regretfully and very respectfully told them how appreciative he was about their extreme kindness and flexibility, but that uprooting a family was just too much of a strain at this time, and that he had to once again decline.

So imagine our surprise later that day, when we heard that he had gotten another call from them at 5:00.

They still wanted him. He could work remote. And he accepted on the spot.

Well let me tell you, it has been two long weeks for our family, but we are counting our blessings, and are amazed at the incomprehensible miracles we have seen. God loves His children, but sometimes you have to take a step into the darkness before you come into light again. Sometimes a leap of faith is necessary to jump into His loving arms, and to know that everything is alright, and everything will be alright. And He will always guide you.

January 23, 2013

If We Saw The World Through A Pool

If we saw the world through a pool,
What kind of things would we see?
The shimmering splendor of Earth
Trapped in a rippling scene?

Would we find the things we had lost?
Would the beauty inside return?
Would seeing the planet anew
Again start to make it turn?

When you look inside of the pool,
Who is in there staring back?
What is in you that isn't in there,
And what has he that you lack?

How would we see those around us
Who dream much like you and I?
They see themselves in reflections,
And both persons there are tied.

Would we look past the imperfections
Of the earthly half that we see?
In the wind-blown waters of pools,
Who can truly see clearly?

If we saw the world through a pool,
We would never have to look far,
And how much better would we be,
If we could see things as they are?

~Trevor Howell