Top 10 Things - Elevators

I've decided that I'm going to do this new thing, which is every week or so, I'm going to post a top 10 list of something completely random. So here's the first of the many to come. Enjoy!
P.S. If you want me to post a top 10 list on something, just post your idea below in the comments.

Top 10 Things
To do in Elevators

1. After getting on and somebody asks you which floor you're headed to, reply, "Oh, just the next one." Once the following floor is reached, realize that the floor you were actually destined to was the one after that. Repeat. Once the top floor is reached, change your mind and say, "actually, I'm just gonna go to the food court back on the first floor."
2. Count all of the different perfume scents you can smell on the ladies. If you can't smell it from where you're at, put your nose right up against their shoulder. If they ask you what on earth you're doing, reply, "sorry ma'am, I just couldn't quite identify the perfume you had on today." If she replies that she isn't wearing perfume, suddenly exclaim, "WHAT?! YOU LIVE IN AMERICA AND YOU DON'T WEAR PERFUME?!" Get off on the next floor disgusted.
3. Pretend you're blasting off in a rocket ship when the elevator is going up. (Sound effects are necessary) When the elevator is going down, make the *KSHHHHCK* noise and say, "Houston, we have a problem."
4. When the elevator is stationary, jump up and down, pounding the ground of it with your fists and scream at the top of your lungs, "NO NO NO!! I WANTED TO GO DOWN! I NEED TO GO DOWN!! WHY DOES EVERYBODY ALWAYS GO UP??? I NEED TO GO DOWN!" Count how many people you keep from entering your elevator. Remember that score and try to beat it the next day.
5. After entering the elevator, walk strait to the corner and sit, facing the wall and hugging your knees. After a couple of minutes start rocking back and forth. After another few minutes start softly whispering to yourself, "I can't do this. You can't make me do this. Please stop. Please stop. I can't do this." If you're not the only one in the elevator by the time you've reached the top floor, you loose.
6. Take pictures of everybody inside the elevator. Be sure to get close ups of their face. Without zooming in. If anybody asks you what you're doing, say, "I need proof that I was in public today. My dad said I was out of practice, ever since... the accident..." Trail off, then start crying. Run out of the elevator with your head in your hands on the next floor you stop at.
7. Stand inside the elevator with your arms crossed facing the door. Every time somebody enters, start shouting at the top of your lungs, "ARE YOU KIDDING?! ANOTHER ONE?? WHAT IS THIS COUNTRY'S PROBLEM?! YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF! TAKING THE ELEVATORS WHEN YOU SHOULD BE GETTING THE EXERCISE THAT YOU OBVIOUSLY NEED! WHAT DO YOU THINK THE STAIRS WERE BUILT FOR HUH? TO JUST SIT AND ROT AND IN THE FUTURE BE PUT INTO A MUSEUM FOR YOUNG OBESE PEOPLE TO LOOK AT AND SAY, 'What the heck did they use these things for?' WELL, DID YOU?!" See how many people you turn away. If you make anybody cry, you get bonus points.
8. Whenever somebody at least 30 years older than you walks into the elevator, start staring at them with that flirtatious type look. Rotate your hips side to side and have your arms playing with themselves in the front of your body. If they look at you, give them a small wave and blush. If they start walking towards you to talk to you, inform them that you weren't waving at them, you just have Turret syndrome and people often have the misconception that you're waving at them. If it's somebody of the same gender that starts walking towards you, slap them and say, "Who do you think I am?!" Storm out of the elevator on the next stop.
9. Wait on the outside of the elevator and continually press the up and down buttons. When the elevator arrives, get wide eyed and violently shake your head and say, "No, don't make me go in there! I'm claustrophobic!" Then scream. Once the elevator doors close, start to cry and say, "It left without me again! Why does this always happen to me?" Repeat.
10. If you're riding on one of those fancy elevators that have an intercom that asks you where your destination is, talk back to it by saying things like, "Wouldn't you like to know?" or, "The twelfth dimension." It makes no difference if the speaker is an intercom or an actual human elevator operator in a fancy suit.